He Likes Me... I Don't Like Him

BOYS, May 2007, by Jenifer Merifield


He Likes Me...
I Don't Like Him!


Dear Jenifer,
There’s a guy in my school who likes me a lot. He’s asked me to the dance twice, and has asked me to be his girlfriend. I have said no to everything as nicely as I can. I told him I didn’t like him that way but I thought he was a nice person. Well, he is STILL asking me and it’s making me very uncomfortable. I feel like being mean to make him stop. Why is he still trying and what do I do?
~ Signed, Not Interested!


Dear Not Interested!,
I have to say, you are already handling your situation very maturely and very well. While being nice is admirable and something the world could use a lot more of, honouring yourself and your boundaries is much more important in a case like this.Sometimes the words we say are interpreted to mean something completely different. A word I encourage ALL girls to practice using is ‘no’. Not just saying it, but following through with actions to prove that no means no. For instance, if you say no when a guy asks if you could help him with something, and then after pleading and bugging you, you give in to make him stop, he learns that your no doesn’t mean no. Next, you could find yourself in a serious “NO” situation with a guy, and you have already taught him that no doesn’t always mean no for you. Be true to your word! Your actions must reflect them. When you show that you follow through on what you say, even when it’s easier to just give in, people won’t ask you more than once. You have been nice enough with this guy. Tell him no and follow through with getting someone else involved to back you if that’s what it takes.

~ Jenifer

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