More Dear Diary Blogs
- My Body Isn't Developing Fast Enough!
- It's Demanding to be PERFECT!
- OBSESSED with celebrities!
- Guys, the media?... who's to blame for the way girls behave?
- Trying To Be Better Than BORING
- My Style Vs. My Mom's Style
- How do siblings stop fighting and start getting along?
- Bad Driving
- Feeling Like a LOSER
- What's Wrong With My BFF?
- The Truth about Marijuana
- STOP the Negative Thinking
- Just Tired and Sad? Or is it Depression?
- Figuring Out Your FUTURE!
- Starting your own Diary
- An Awkward Topic
- Sister Squabbles
- Sweating and smelly, what's a girl to do?
- Dealing with Being Teased
- Boys on the Brain!
- Feeling Stuck When Friends Are Changing
- SWEARING: What's the big deal?
- First Kiss, was it a mistake?
- Interview with a Bully
- Death and the Loss of a Loved One
- Interview with a girl who has been bullied
- My parents divorced...and it gets worse!
- Sisters - same genes, just not the same 'jeans'
- Oh No...BFFs like the same guy!
- Sometimes I really DON'T LIKE my Mom!
- I tried smoking. Now how do I say no?
- How Come I'm Not Allowed?
- Are My Friends Really Friends?
June 2008 Blogs
- Real Girl: Shevya
- Feeling Stuck When Friends Are Changing
- No Matter What!
- Career Watch: Wedding Planner
- Ponytails of Love
- How to Create Your Own Time Capsule
- Ask a Guy: best childhood memory, fave sport, fashion and the way you look, guys pants hanging low
- Quebec
- The Problem with Plastics
- Gnarls Barkley, Rap/Alternative
- Panic at the Disco, Rock/Punk/Alternative
- Locks and Lashes: will my hair turn green, makeup and sensitive skin, sunscreen and moisturizer, stage makeup tips
- Spring Cleaning
Feeling Stuck When Friends Are Changing
DEAR DIARY, JUNE 2008, by Nada Adams
Feeling Stuck When Friends Are Changing
Dear Diary,
I feel like I’m stuck in someone else’s life. I look around and see my friends changing. I love them but they’re being careless now with stuff like smoking, the way they talk, and just being mean to other people. At home my parents work so much that we hardly have any time together, it’s just the same thing every day. I’ve been watching those reality shows, they’re so addictive, but dumb because I know they don’t make me a better person. So I feel lost like I want to be somewhere else having different friends and being happy every day. But in reality people just think I’m weird, so I go with the flow of not really doing anything. I feel like there’s got to be more, but I feel so bummed. Am I just stuck until I grow up?
~Signed, Feeling Stuck, 15, Tweed ON
Dear Stuck,
Good for you for noticing that you want something more and for not giving in to peer pressure in regards to “being careless and smoking or being mean”.
It sounds a little like you’re giving up though. Watching TV you know “isn’t making you a better person”, and “going with the flow” with your friends? How bad do you want the happiness you talk about? Change won’t happen until you want it bad enough that you’ll take action to do something about it!
Change in itself can be great and whether our change is supportive or non-supportive, we’re forever changing. Your friends may be changing in that they are making choices that aren’t so good for them, and soon you’ll have to decide what kind of changes you need to make. It sounds to me like you could use some new friends... supportive ones who you have more in common with. We become only as successful, productive or happy as the people we hang out the most with. Get yourself around happy, positive people. They are out there and closer than you think.
You know, the fact that your friends think you’re weird is actually a great sign. It means that you really are different and maybe you are going with the flow less than you think. That’s a great thing! It makes you an independent thinker and someone with leadership qualities. You have the awareness to stand out and not follow the herd. So find the courage and stop following the herd! If you shrink to be like everyone else -especially those you think are careless- you are only hiding from who you really are.
Tell yourself you are smart! Smart people are decisive, focused and action-oriented.
I encourage you to take action following your heart and your values.
You’re bummed out because your heart is trying to tell you something. Listen and take action! Love yourself enough to cut the cord with people who only bring you down. Love yourself enough to pursue your dreams. Accept that during your journey you will sometimes walk alone, and that’s okay. It always gets better. Remember that you are never stuck unless you choose to be. As long as you are living with integrity and are approving of yourself – you will find the happiness you dream of long before you grow up!
~ Nada